Unsung Heroes - The Boob Modeler

The other day I was thinking about the guy that gets to model the boobs in major video game releases. You know, the guy that works with Tomonobu Itagaki for months on end trying to get the jiggle in Kasumi's blouse just right. The guy that spends 60 hours a week on one boob in Soul Calibur. I was thinking, is this guy happy?

You can imagine that getting that job is either a gift or a curse. I can see the guys around the office drawing straws to determine who gets to work on titty physics for the next three years. I just wonder if it's a good thing or a bad thing. I suppose that what you're rooting for (short or long straw) entirely depends on your love of the boob. Of course, it's possible to be a boob lover, but not want that job at all.

I'm talking about the gynecologist problem. Why else do guys go into gynecology except to see lady bits all day? It's got to be a pretty exciting time, getting into medical school, graduating, and then opening up a practice. Then, after a week and 30 or so very hairy appointments, the realization has to set in that this is what you're going to be doing for a very long time.

This has to be what the boob guy goes through. The first couple months are great. Researching nipples on the internet. Buying Juggs magazine and being able to write it off. Watching Baywatch. Then, just like when you say a word over and over, the boob loses it's meaning. It's just another pixelated blob.

I feel for this guy. If there's an unsung hero in the gaming industry, it's him. He presses his face between those cold, computerized mammaries and motorboats the hell out of them, just so we can enjoy Dead or Alive Paradise the way it was meant to be enjoyed.

With one hand.

Unsung Heroes - The Boob Modeler

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Is it just me, or are people getting stupider? No where is this more apparent than jumping into a match of Halo 3. It never fails when I jump into a social match, people call me out for one reason or another. And they always say my name wrong. As if I've somehow spelled it in some strange way. As far as I know, the word Gemini has been around for a few years. I didn't' make it up. But somehow, I'm always referred to as Gee-mini. Like I'm mini. I actually had a kid who couldn't have been more than 12 tell some other guy who was probably in his twenties how to say it...INCORRECTLY!

"Look, it says Gee-mini." "Oh", the guys says. He actually had said it right and was shot down by the kid.

Amazing!

Then, once we were in the map, both of them called me a fag for not helping them and not killing the guys killing them.

What amazes me is the fact that people resort to all sorts of misspellings in order to have a unique gamertag. They use 1337 speak, they insert little x's between each letter of their name. And somehow, when we're in a game, everyone gets called by the right name. "Hey, P33intheshower, pick me and xTHExMADxMANx up in the Warthog!" Meanwhile, I get "hey, gee-mini ass!" I mean, I appreciate people saying I have a mini ass, but still.

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